- Night terrors who? ...the #mompost of all #momposts... -

...and a fugly feather-tossled pigeon with some seriously discolored/baggy eyes, at that. Humph. We've been having some serious night terrors in 'dis house...

...and I'm not talking about the sleep disorder that causes one to wake up in a cold sweat.

I'm talking about this:

noun: night terrors:  TWO weasels who want to bed-share and WON'T SLEEP A WINK. 

Though they be cute, they be TERRIBLY DIFFICULT at bedtime!!! We take full credit for Harper's issues; we ruined her at a young age by letting her stay up stupidly late hoping, in turn, she would sleep in later in the morning... I was on night shift back then and didn't want to rise and shine at 6:00 in the A to the M like most normal moms do. Our plan worked, but she has since remained a night owl [never interested in settling down in her bed before 9:30pm, sometimes 10-10:30pm!] and it's spiraled out of control during this maternity leave. There's a clear problem when the adults are yawning and ready for bed and the toddler is still running around full speed ahead ...NOT to mention that Brian and I never ever have alone/adult time in the evenings because Harper stays up so late and we immediately collapse into our bed and pass out as soon as we finally get her to sleep.  And Scarlett can't help it, but she's entering the fussy stage and the witching hour is ...put nicely, just, "very witchy!" The pediatrician told me that most babies get gassy between 1-2 months and will usually get fussy at the same time every day [which for her seems to be 6pm until bedtime, ugh!].  Add these issues to the fact that Brian travels overnight for work, and ...#zomg.  Momma can't hang.  He was gone for three consecutive nights last week, and after the first night I lost my sh*t and packed our entire house up for a three-day staycation/sleepover at Grammy and Papa's:

^^ ...which of course, the girls loved!  Scarlett was initially unsure of her sleeping arrangements, but she made due.  But even at Grammy and Papa's, night time was a sheer disaster and my mom and I ended up 1:1 with the kids because #oh #em #geeeeeeeee. Started the "bedtime process" at 9:00 and at 11:39pm both rats were still awake and melting down.  How/why does this happen???

THAT WAS IT!  The late bedtime was all fun and games with one kiddo, but I/we cannot function like this with the twin terrors! Brian will be traveling again [more frequently than I'd like] and I'll be back to work next month; I can't pack us up and move into Grammy and Papa's for three days every time I'm stuck as the solo parent... 

Something must change!!!  And very very soon, at that.

I spewed out all these issues in dramatic detail and hashed out our noobish non-routine with my friend, Shannon, who is a unicorn of a parent and has her kids both tucked into bed and sleeping no later than 7:30pm every night [whoa! I literally can't even imagine that bliss...]. She gave me some great tips, and Brian and I easily agreed that we needed to initiate "BEDTIME BOOTCAMP" immediately. Long story short, we've held our ground for one full week and, overall, it seems to be working pretty well...

...so well that Scarlett's been knocked out in her Pack 'n Play by 8pm every night and Harper snoring in her bed by 9pm.  We've tweaked nap time and added in a rewards system for the next day if the new rules are followed. Scarlett's been cake and Harper's a work in progress!  Brian and I watched a TV show together in total peace and quiet the other night, and I said, "Wow, the house is eerily quiet!" to which Brian responded, "I know... It's almost like they're gone...!" 

Word. 

Annnnnd omg, HOLY MOM POST!  I just read back through that and even I'm depressed that I stooped low enough to barf a post about the bedtime routine.......
 
...so let's cut this off before I stoop even lower.

Subject change to redeem myself:  56 degrees today! Time for a family stroll through the neighborhood! Vitamin D for you and you and you!  Springtime sunshine, please stay!

Bye now!