Randomly, excitedly:
"MOMMY! I know one reindeer 'dat be-wongs [belongs] to Santa! ...RU-DOF!"
While driving during a downpour:
"I bet 'dose rainshields [windshield wipers] are getting ti-yud [tired]!"
As Juliette was fussing while Grammy was babysitting:
"Welllll Ju-wee-ette, we are very sorry but dere's no nipple for you today!"
Shout/yelling before bed on Twinkle Toes's first night out:
Scarlett: "DO. NOT. TOUCH. 'DA. ELF. ELSE. HE. WILL. WOOSE. HIS. MAGIC."
Brian, Harper, Juliette, me: .....
After school pickup:
Scarlett: "I didn't cry at 'cool today!"
Me: "Oh yeah? That's good! Did you miss me?"
Scarlett: "Well, yeah I did. But I was glad I was at 'cool so I didn't have to wisten [listen] to all your bossy taking."
Me: .....

While driving by the life-size nativity stable/creche setup at our church:
"LOOK! MOMMY, LOOK OUT 'DA WINDOW! IT'S JESUS'S HOUSE!"
On the way to the grocery store:
"Mommy! I putted on my seat belt so 'da police won't see me and get us in trouble!"
Randomly:
"I wished I could see Santa, but I can't because he is at 'da Norf Pole..."
On Christmas Day at 12:42pm:
Scarlett: "Mommy, when will Santa come again?"
Me: "Next year!"
Scarlett: "Oh. Well I didn't even HEAR Santa last night, so pob-ee [probably] he will come again tonight and leave more tings [things]."
Me: .....
While cleaning up her room:
Scarlett: "Daddy, is anybody a buh-wee?"
Brian: "A what?"
Scarlett: "A BUH-WEE!"
Brian: "Oh, a bully?"
Scarlett: "Yes."
Brian: "I don't know..."
Scarlett: "Well, maybe just BAD GUYS are buh-wees."

Randomly:
Scarlett: "Mommy, did you 'moke [smoke] a cig-a-wette [cigarette] when you were a kid?"
Me: "No."
Scarlett: "Did Daddy?"
Me: "No."
Scarlett: "Did Juliette?"
Me: ".....No."
Scarlett: "Oh."
While playing with her toys from Christmas:
Scarlett: "I didn't orda' [order] a gumball uh-chine [machine] from Santa... I fink [think] maybe he got mixed up."
Me: "Well maybe sometimes Santa brings things he thinks you might like even if it wasn't on your list."
Scarlett: ".....'Dat's [that's] what I was JUST tinking [thinking]!"
On the way to get helium-filled balloons for her birthday, clearly assuming we were prepping for a water wars party:
"Mommy, is 'da b'loons gonna have water in 'dem?"
After dinner:
"Mommy, I've loved you for twenty one hundred forty days!"
Randomly:
Scarlett: "Mom, why did 'da bird cross 'da road?"
Me: "Hmmmm, I don't know?"
Scarlett: "Because it had to poop! Didn't you eva' think about 'dat?"
Me: .....