- And just like that... -

...we have a one year old! 

Literally, seriously, totally can't even BELIEVE how fast this past year came and went.  It feels like I was still waddling around being all term prego just a few months ago...................and now all the sudden there's a mobile, miniature human with a giant personality living in my house!  What!  I say it all the time, but I really mean it this time: time can slow down now...

Tonight after Harper fell asleep, I pulled up all these old chalkboard photos and Brian and I reminisced on the ups and downs and the positives and negatives and the happys and sads -- AKA -- parenthood -- AKA -- the craziest [but best] roller-coaster responsibility we've ever been given.  And when we put the 1-month photo next to the 12-month photo, Brian said, "She's still got that same look to her.............beautiful." 

Be still my heart!

It's true what Daddy says: you are so sooo beautiful, Harper Bear! We love you more and more every month!!! <3

Happy first birthday, sweet angel! Thank you for the best 12 months ever!!! xoxox

- A day in the lyfe... -

The princess is almost one year old... So today I'mma be makin' a noble, noteworthy attempt to cling to every little last bit of her 11-month-old-ness. Cheers to a regular ole' day in the life of our sweet little Bear!

6:56am --  Harper be like, "Mornin', Mommy..... PLEASE get up!" [She wakes up between 6:52-7:06am .e.v.e.r.y..s.i.n.g.l.e..d.a.y.....even on the weekends rawr! Sometimes we try to put her into our bed and snuggle her back to sleep, but nope, not a chance. Dude is standing up and cock-ca-doodle-doo-ing while smacking the railing of her crib the second the sun hits the horizon.]

9:30am -- Post-breakfast plate of grapes! She learned how to use her fork earlier this month and she is so thrilled to feed herself and be an autonomous big girl! 

10:00am -- Grandma was on vacation for a a couple weeks and hadn't seen her baby, so she stopped in for a visit...  We perused a bag full of new spring/summer clothes I bought for Harper! *teeth-smiling emoji* [...Sometimes I get carried away at Carters...] ...But Harper always approves, obvi.

 

~10:30am - 12:45pm -- Nap time! Little Miss loves her sleep, and if we've learned one thing over the past year it's this: NEVER DISTURB/WAKE A SLEEPING BEAR. Ever.  Normal morning nap spans anywhere from 1-3 hours...but usually 1.5-2 hours is a winner.

All afternoon: let's play! 

...Favorite toy to date [as evidenced by our family "going on" approx 26 picnics per day :)].  Thanks, Blake and Laura and family; you stock our house with the BEST toys! <3

 

2:40pm -- In the process of ordering carpet for the basement; Harper placed her vote by climbing all over the carpet squares and tooting on the sample of her choice... [We did, in fact, purchase her #1 pick!] 

~3:00pm - ? -- Nap time again! ...Or is it? Ain't nobody got time for a second nap today! [But usually/almost always, we take an afternoon nap if the morning one is short or average or even long...] 

Back to the living room floor for play time instead...

7:30pm -- Strippin' down for a tub...

...but first she must empty the lotion basket ^^ and also comb her hair incessantly until Mommy notices and compliments, "Oh beautifulllllll, Harper! So beautiful!" [...We've always taken ego-boosting to a whole new level in this household.]

7:45pm -- ...or whenever we get around to it... -- BATH TIME! Harper's favorite time! She loves to splish and splash and has taken a new liking to throwing all her toys out of the tub and also trying to stand up in the water...

8:30pm -- Dressed in the fuzzy fleecies and supposed to be winding down for bedtime... Harper's bedtime is quite variable [and totally dependent on how the naps went that day, too]...but anywhere between...

8:00pm - 10:30 pm -- Zzzzzzzzzzzzz, she's zonk-a-roo'ed and out 'til the next morning. 

And then, before we know it...

...It's 7:02am and the Bear be standing up in her crib yelling, "DA-DAAAAAAAAA!" And we fetch her from her nursery and bring her to all bed and start a new day all over again. :) 

- If bears could talk... -

...then I think a few moments inside Harper Bear's brain would be like:

 

And currently...

^^Touche... She took the thought right out of my mind! ;) 

I'm out! Catch ya'll on the flip side.

- Hello, March... -

So we meet again.

Wait.

MARCH?!?

Everyone warned me when I delivered, "Enjoy every minute! Time flies!" ...Which of course I did! But I also took part of that advice with a grain of salt, because [in my pre-baby life] there were plenty of instances when I would literally sit on the couch and watch the clock tick by, anxiously anticipating something on this day or that month and wanting to jump ahead to this certain week so I could have "X, Y, and Z" ..r.i.g.h.t..n.o.w.. because patience has never been my strong suit and a constant need for instant gratification is definitely my weakness.  Sh*t, man, my past life sounds so depressing.  But time ticked by at its own pace and I was just a pawn in the game of life and that was how it was. 

But now? I would kill for those lingering moments when time stood still... I mean seriously, how is it March 2016??! <---That reality just literally blows my poor pea brain.  I've been VERY emotional and sentimental today as I've constantly been reminded of Harper's impending birthday [*tear* *sniff and more sniffs*].  So stupidly, I decided to scroll through some of the old "pregnancy diary" posts on the blog...which made me even more sappy and sad and *sigh*...  Baaaasically, motherhood has made me a mess of a human. But! In re-reading, I concluded two things:  a) I clearly dove off the deep end outlining .every.single.minute.detail. in the birth story posts novels [what's that you say about beating a dead horse even deader?],  but b) I totally skipped out on the tail end of pregnancy (!!!) and the eager anticipation of the arrival of our very beloved Baby F -- AKA-- Harper!  So! Throwin' back today with a post I'm fairly certain no one cares about [except me and my sappy mom-self, obviously], but it's my blog and I do what I want, so.....

Helloooo, big baby bump!

Minutes after I posted this pic on the Gram of Instas, everyone thought a preterm delivery was in my cards, because...GIANT Amazon Woman and big ole' budding baby... 

But the days came and went and Baby F and I shocked everyone and their mothers by making it to 35+ weeks...

We had my 36w OB appointment on President's Day; Brian was off work for the holiday and there was a white-out-condition-type blizzard hovering over our humble abode. Everyone else in town was pretending to be a damn shut-in and Facebook was plastered with posts of the empty milk and bread shelves at Wal-Mart and Schnucks suggesting a snow/ice-induced famine was on the way.  But severe weather conditions can't push a term prego down: I gently coaxed/threatened Brian into driving me to the appointment, because I was SURE that [with all the contractions and general colossal-ness] I would be 5-ish centimeters dilated and my OB would just sweetly send us over to labor and delivery to break my bag and meet our nugget. [These were my real thought processes at the time, as illustrated by: having hair done and make-up applied, donning pregnancy week-by-week shirt with confidence that it would be the last time I got to mark off another week, and throwing hospital bags in the trunk of the car in anticipation of a 3-day/2-night stay...]

...But dreams shattered in 0.3 seconds as my OB announced I was only "a fingertip" dilated [and I've been in this business long enough to know damn well that meant closed/thick/high, so humph].  But hugs to my awesome OB who was always agreeable to pose in my crazy photoshoots [only after a mild hesitation and a, "Wait.........what are you doing with this photo?" #blog #always #duh]. 

Home for some not-fun in the snow...

38+ weeks led to the discovery of nesting [nesting is a real thing for mommies and daddies alike!] AND the invasion of my dad's t-shirt stash. ...Even Brian's shirts weren't cutting it to cover all 'dat surface area... 

Finally, a new week of gestating began and you think I'd have a fresh outlook on life, but nope!  Never. And I'll also never forget this night at work: I was 39w2d weeks and for WEEKS I had been taking care of prego patients who were less gestation than I. ...Which is all great and glorious until a non-term patient was like, "Hey I dropped this, can you bend over and pick it up for me?" ...to which I immediately thought, "I am soooo much bigger than you, b*tch........." ...but, seeing that I am a decent human being, I always enthusiastically responded, "Of course!" ...then began the 3-minute process of bending over and trying to get back up sans toppling over due to hugely disproportioned body weight.  Omg, where was I going with that mini-rant??? Oh. Yeah, so I was in the mood of all moods during this shift and decided to snap a little 3am sorrow-selfie with REALLY high hopes that it would be the last shift before I got to hold Baby F in my arms and not in my pelvis...

...and it was! 

#hallelujah #hallelujah #amen

Because then...

...hello, labor!